3/10/10

EEG's measure a persons brain waves and I took an EEG test on Monday this week. It was not an enjoyable experience for me. I was told to stay up as late as possible the night before so that I would fall asleep during the test. The longest part of the test was the set-up phase. My head was measured and marked and the wires were attached with tape. Before the wires can be taped to my head a citrus smelling cream (with something scratchy in it) was smeared on my face and scalp. The cream provided a slight burning sensation and left a sah-weet red mark behind. And the tests began. Phase 1. A bright light is positioned in front of my face and for about 3-4 mins, while my eyes were closed, it flashes. Each flash felt like I was looking at the sun. Phase 2. The hyperventilation test. Pretty much what it sounds like. I hyperventilated for 3 mins. The room was VERY cold and my nose felt frozen and would break off. Phase 3. This was the portion of the test I had been looking forward to. 30. mins of sleep. It didn't happen, mostly due to the very cold nature of the room. I did have 2 blankets on. I would call them sheets because the blankets were very thin. I'm waiting to hear back on the final results. Hopefully sometime this week.

Below is something a friend e-mailed to me. I hope you laugh as much as I did.



Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart only good for so many beats, and that it...don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiency. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So steak is nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give you 100% of recommended daily allowance of vegetable product.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food are fried these day in vegetable oil. In fact, they permeated by it. How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways with a Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"
ALSO
For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like.
Speaking English is apparently what kills you!!!

3/4/10

Last week I found out someone I know was diagnosed with cancer. It seems unfair. I took one for the team and no one else should have to go through the fear, anger, denial, and painfully annoying treatments. No one else should have to join the "C" club. I'm still not sure what it is that makes our bodies attack itself. I wish I had the power to stop it from happening to anyone else.

3/2/10

I had the day off from volunteering today and spent some time reflecting. In 2008 and 2009 I lost a bit of weight via the radiation diet. Although I liked the weight changes, I'd been told that I didn't look great. Examples: I looked gaunt, I lacked color, I looked tired. To combat this rapid loss of weight a dietitian at University Hospital told me I could EAT anything and everything I wanted. Nothing was off limits. I ate fried cheese, cookies, re fried beans, you name it if it was bad for me I ate it. As a result I put all of the weight plus some extra pounds on FAST.
In Jan. this year my neighbor invited me to join a competition to lose the most weight. The winner collects $20 bucks from all the other competitors. The tally is calculated at the end of this month. My goal is to get healthy and break my bad eating habits. Up until last week I was doing a decent job. And then it happened. We received a magazine from someone listing 5 delicious recipes. I made chocolate chocolate-chip pancakes for breakfast and banana chocolate strudel. Can I say calories never tasted so good. And tomorrow we'll enjoy some sort of flank steak Tex-Mex concoction. I'm happy to share these delightful sensations with anyone wanting to experiment in their kitchen. I do believe I will lose this competition. And I would like to say "Losing never tasted so good."