I have a couple thoughts to share with everyone tonight. 1st thought is about me. I've had a cold for the last few days. Nothing big, but it was enough that I had to call in sick to my volunteer job on Monday. For those of you who used to work with me you know that a cold would never have stopped me from showing up. It'll be over by Friday. I am volunteering 4 days a week for a couple hours each day. New news is that I have stopped looking for a job. This decision came after realizing that even if I were offered a part-time job I would not be able to accept. It was a blow to my rosy, Pollyanna outlook. I'm still not happy about it and will continue to fight my way back to full recovery.
2nd thought. I just heard about a shooting at a middle-school in Denver. I continue to wonder how we have failed ourselves, our neighbors, and our children so completely that shootings at schools continue to happen. I keep asking myself if there is anything that can be done to prevent this from happening again.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
2/2/10
Boulder. Is there really another small city in the U.S.A like it? Where else would there city council issues like public nudity and ticketing the homeless all on the same night. If I had to choose on nudity I'd have to vote to let it continue to let it happen without any legal ramifications. And the homeless topic, gosh... is there an answer that would work for everyone?
I'm about 11 pages in to the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. It turns out that 11 pages is enough. I think I'm hooked.
And if you are not connected to me via facebook and you haven't talked to me on the phone I have good news (it was expected) to report. Last week I had my latest MRI and the results were positive. I admit it is becoming more and more difficult to believe that "Fred" will ever come back.
I'm about 11 pages in to the book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. It turns out that 11 pages is enough. I think I'm hooked.
And if you are not connected to me via facebook and you haven't talked to me on the phone I have good news (it was expected) to report. Last week I had my latest MRI and the results were positive. I admit it is becoming more and more difficult to believe that "Fred" will ever come back.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Dec. 29, 2009
For Christmas this year I received a couple writing books. One of the first suggestions is to write about a childhood memory. And I have decided it wouldn't hurt to share my earliest and possibly funniest moment with you.
I must have been between 2 1/2 and 3 years old. We lived in a tiny 2 bedroom 1 1/2 bath house. It was dark outside so I am assuming it was around bedtime. I remember my mother was changing my sister's diaper on the bathroom counter upstairs, and I desperately wanted to help. Next to my baby sister was a HUGE container of Vaseline. (You get 1 second to guess what happened next.) And lets face it, everything seems big to a 3 year old. I'm pretty sure I was told not to touch the container and I know I didn't listen. I don't remember grabbing the tub, and I know I did because the next thing I remember was being in the kitchen downstairs smearing the greasy sticky stuff everywhere my little hands could reach. This includes and was not limited to the following. The floor, cupboards, knobs, chairs, refrigerator, kitchen table, utensils in drawers, and myself. For some reason I kept the mess in the kitchen and that probably saved me some serious "nose in the corner" time. At some point I realized I was going to be in trouble because I started crying possibly howling. My mother walked in to find the me and the mess I had miraculously created. Now, I don't remember if there was spanking involved or not and I wouldn't be surprised if it happened. I only remember that I was never allowed access to the Vaseline while it was in the house again.
I hope you enjoyed the quick story. Happy New Year!
I must have been between 2 1/2 and 3 years old. We lived in a tiny 2 bedroom 1 1/2 bath house. It was dark outside so I am assuming it was around bedtime. I remember my mother was changing my sister's diaper on the bathroom counter upstairs, and I desperately wanted to help. Next to my baby sister was a HUGE container of Vaseline. (You get 1 second to guess what happened next.) And lets face it, everything seems big to a 3 year old. I'm pretty sure I was told not to touch the container and I know I didn't listen. I don't remember grabbing the tub, and I know I did because the next thing I remember was being in the kitchen downstairs smearing the greasy sticky stuff everywhere my little hands could reach. This includes and was not limited to the following. The floor, cupboards, knobs, chairs, refrigerator, kitchen table, utensils in drawers, and myself. For some reason I kept the mess in the kitchen and that probably saved me some serious "nose in the corner" time. At some point I realized I was going to be in trouble because I started crying possibly howling. My mother walked in to find the me and the mess I had miraculously created. Now, I don't remember if there was spanking involved or not and I wouldn't be surprised if it happened. I only remember that I was never allowed access to the Vaseline while it was in the house again.
I hope you enjoyed the quick story. Happy New Year!
Monday, December 21, 2009
12/21/09
It's been a while since I've posted anything. I haven't posted anything because I've been feeling better and stronger and I'm out in the world volunteering. It's an amazing healer to help others and not focus on oneself.
Today I ran across an article entitled
Cancer Lesson's: What we wished we'd known http://www.care2.com/greenliving/cancer-lessons-what-we-wish-wed-known.html?&page=3
(I'm only going to type out the bullet points and add a response from my perspective)
1. Doctor's forget to share the gory details. I have the highest amount of respect for oncologists. These highly educated people deal with cancer and treatments all day long everyday. Meaning they are doing their best to heal us. I shouldn't have been surprised to learn (towards the end of my radiation) that my radiation treatments were going to give me a burn that could, however unlikely, cause me skin cancer. Or that, and this is gross, pooping after 5 days of no pooping is very unpleasant.
2. Insurance can cause more stress than cancer. NO S#!@. And it's not just your medical insurance. It's the long-term disability and social security paperwork and phone calls each individual must deal with. Because there is no central agency to outline the process of who needs what and why it's important. I still get a bit panicky when someone from insurance calls because they are either calling to say they aren't going to pay (because someone billed it wrong) and then it becomes your own responsibility to get it corrected. OR they are calling because they want to see if you might be able to work and they can stop paying benefits out. Oh the stories I can share and probably already have.
3. Not all blood & chemo technicians are created equal. It is the person who keeps trying to find your vein thus creating a bruise for people to see over then next few days that always helps me to appreciate the good ones. Next time you have your blood drawn or receive an IV and the job gets done in one poke, please make sure to thank that technician.
4. Nurses know, and anticipate, what you need. Amen sister!
5. Cancer is different in younger patients than in older ones. It doesn't seem fair that children are diagnosed with cancer. They haven't had their chance to experience life.
6. Hospice is not just for the dying. I didn't know this. I do wish I had known Meals on Wheels wasn't just for the elderly. It would have been a huge help back during treatments.
7. Eat your broccoli and kale and other greens. Sounds good. But how much more do I have to eat?
8. Cancer can be a punch line. Humor makes everything so much easier to deal with. I named mine "Fred".
I'm off to figure out why my latest MRI wasn't covered by insurance. Wish me patience and luck. Reference bullet no. 2.
Today I ran across an article entitled
Cancer Lesson's: What we wished we'd known http://www.care2.com/greenliving/cancer-lessons-what-we-wish-wed-known.html?&page=3
(I'm only going to type out the bullet points and add a response from my perspective)
1. Doctor's forget to share the gory details. I have the highest amount of respect for oncologists. These highly educated people deal with cancer and treatments all day long everyday. Meaning they are doing their best to heal us. I shouldn't have been surprised to learn (towards the end of my radiation) that my radiation treatments were going to give me a burn that could, however unlikely, cause me skin cancer. Or that, and this is gross, pooping after 5 days of no pooping is very unpleasant.
2. Insurance can cause more stress than cancer. NO S#!@. And it's not just your medical insurance. It's the long-term disability and social security paperwork and phone calls each individual must deal with. Because there is no central agency to outline the process of who needs what and why it's important. I still get a bit panicky when someone from insurance calls because they are either calling to say they aren't going to pay (because someone billed it wrong) and then it becomes your own responsibility to get it corrected. OR they are calling because they want to see if you might be able to work and they can stop paying benefits out. Oh the stories I can share and probably already have.
3. Not all blood & chemo technicians are created equal. It is the person who keeps trying to find your vein thus creating a bruise for people to see over then next few days that always helps me to appreciate the good ones. Next time you have your blood drawn or receive an IV and the job gets done in one poke, please make sure to thank that technician.
4. Nurses know, and anticipate, what you need. Amen sister!
5. Cancer is different in younger patients than in older ones. It doesn't seem fair that children are diagnosed with cancer. They haven't had their chance to experience life.
6. Hospice is not just for the dying. I didn't know this. I do wish I had known Meals on Wheels wasn't just for the elderly. It would have been a huge help back during treatments.
7. Eat your broccoli and kale and other greens. Sounds good. But how much more do I have to eat?
8. Cancer can be a punch line. Humor makes everything so much easier to deal with. I named mine "Fred".
I'm off to figure out why my latest MRI wasn't covered by insurance. Wish me patience and luck. Reference bullet no. 2.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
11/17/09
About a year and a half ago I started taking walks around the block with Cora. Around that time I noticed that there were a set of car keys hanging on one of our stop signs. It isn't obvious that they're there and I'm sure most neighbors have never seen them. Today I walked past that same stop sign and the keys are still there. I'm curious if they've been forgotten or if there is another reason they just hang out 24/7. If I took those keys would someone put up a sign that says "Lost Keys, Please return to Stop Sign"? Regardless, I'm clearly not interested enough to knock on doors to find out because at this point does it really matter?
Monday, November 2, 2009
Nov. 11 2009
I received my MRI results Thursday last week. I am happy to report that "Fred" was no where to be seen. My next MRI is scheduled for Jan 2010. I think I have this c stuff licked.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
10/17/09
I went to the gym today and I ran into Kathy. She is a warm and friendly personality who has also had cancer, and we met when I helped her with her YMCA membership. I was a bit overcome with surprise when she hugged me and gave me a kiss and also held my hand to the locker room. I've spent maybe 20 minutes with Kathy.... TOTAL. This includes the tour of the YMCA a quick sales pitch and then checking her in 4 times. This sounds like an incredibly insensitive reaction towards someone. Is it wrong to not want to hug & kiss someone I hardly know? I've got friends that I've never hugged or kissed.
Derek and I came back from our Colorado vacation on Thursday. It was a lot of fun. We visited friends, took tours in Mesa Verde, hiked up to Hanging Lake, saw Doc Holiday's memorial, sat in the hot springs, went to the Garden of the Gods, and took a cave tour. We did stay at 3 different hotels and 1 of them gave us a free upgrade to a suite. If I had to pick my favorites I would have to select seeing friends, Mesa Verde, and the Hanging Lake. It took more energy than I was expecting to ride in a car and be alert during the daylight hours. Thankfully we were on vacation and it was o.k. to take naps in the middle of the day.
I continue to feel good. My next MRI comes up October 22nd and I find out the results October 27th. Scheduling conflict, go figure.
Derek and I came back from our Colorado vacation on Thursday. It was a lot of fun. We visited friends, took tours in Mesa Verde, hiked up to Hanging Lake, saw Doc Holiday's memorial, sat in the hot springs, went to the Garden of the Gods, and took a cave tour. We did stay at 3 different hotels and 1 of them gave us a free upgrade to a suite. If I had to pick my favorites I would have to select seeing friends, Mesa Verde, and the Hanging Lake. It took more energy than I was expecting to ride in a car and be alert during the daylight hours. Thankfully we were on vacation and it was o.k. to take naps in the middle of the day.
I continue to feel good. My next MRI comes up October 22nd and I find out the results October 27th. Scheduling conflict, go figure.
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